Saturday, June 10, 2006

put it on my bill...


as becky was so kind to report (in the 'comments' a few posts back), they opened up that duck and found only grain in it's little duck belly. no alien.

she and i scoffed, "cover up."

now i see that the duck itself went for close to $10,000 dollars on ebay the other day. the animal hosptial, which thought that they might be able to raise a couple hundred bucks to help out at the clinic, were stunned by how high the bidding went. me too, but i'm a big animal lover so if you look at it as a donation, that's a pretty nice contribution.

apparently the duck came in with a broken wing, hence the alien revealing x-ray. they later related that the duck later died as a result of it's injuries.

the doctors who performed the inevitable autopsy did add that they were a bit tentative when they made their first incision, images of john hurt spasming on the nostromo's dinner table running through their minds. to me, it's nice to know that they didn't dismiss the possibility of something...unknown.

because it's the way i'm wired--i want to believe and i'm always making up stories--conspiracy theories are racing around in my head. there WAS something in there but the goverment seized it. no, wait, BEDLAM seized it! the agency's men in black showed up, took the carcas and 'told' everyone to forget what they saw. they replaced it with another duck that looks exactly- but, wait! the x-ray would prove that they're two different ducks. one of the young vets in the animal clinic notices the slightest difference and x-rays the new duck, the wing on this new bird showing a different kind of break! and because her fiance is a hypnotherapist, she undergoes regression therapy to remember what the men in black made her forget--that there WAS something in the duck, something that the men in black excised while still there at the clinic, a small worm-like alien, still alive and pissed, angry that it's terran hosts--my GOD! they were in league with this alien!!?--would allow it to be ingested like a DUCK!?!? but the vet doesn't trust her memories and needs more proof. she and her boyfriend start their own investigation, heading first to the home of the crazy people who paid $10,000 bucks for a duck full of grain (when there's this really nice place i know of not far away where you can get a delicious "canard l'orange" for just $18.95...) the new duck owner scoffs at her, unwilling to let her touch the bird, but maybe also not willing to entertain the fact that she just might be right. they argue but it all soon comes to an end when two sleek black 1966 lincoln continentals pull up out front and eight men in black emerge heading ominously for house. now he believes, doesn't he? now the three of them, plus the duck owners mildly rebellious teenage son are on the lam, desperately trying to get this faux fowl, this replacement mallard to some authority that will confirm that there is indeed a cover-up going on here, launching their own investigation, exposing an alien conspiracy, and clearing the name of the vet. but somehow, during the incredible chase scene that covers most of san francisco, the young vet gets caught and rendered unconscious. when she comes to she is tied to a chair under a single light in a very dark room. two voices discuss what she knows and what they should do about her. one fo the men in black steps out of the shadows and into the light, holding something in his hand. she defiantly tells them that they'll never get away with this, she'll talk, she'll tell. "but I won't." says the other voice and she has just enough time to register that the voice came from the squirming, wriggling thing in the man's gloved hand, as he forces her jaws and drops the slug-like alien into her open mouth...

man, i don't know what happens next--just a crazy thought...
sorry, got carried away there.

(would you believe i only planned on a short little entry today...? i gotta get to work!)

more tomorrow.


Brian said...

Todd that's brilliant and what an incredible final scene. Too bad they don't have Twilight Zone or Outer Limits anymore, that would be a great episode.

PERHAPS, you'll find some where to use that scene, or perhaps NAUT.

todd said...


nah, that was just a rambling 'what if' that got outta control...i gotta learn to stop myself.
thanks for the nice words though!

Jason Copland said...

Ever since that scene in Star Trek II, the thought of slug-like creatures entering human orifices just creeps me right out. Thanks, Todd, now I won't get to sleep tonight.....


todd said...


heh pleasure.

: )