Thursday, November 30, 2006

from figaro, with love...


so WAAAAAY back when mike wieringo and i were doing tellos and collecting a good number of fans and friends on our website (we had a rockin' message board!), there were probably about 8 or 9 very frequent posters that soon became known to us as our tellos family. kojee, sus, xavier, maukingbird, figaro...they were a wonderfully positive, vocal bunch who, not only dug the comic, they dug each other and really supported one another in thier messages back and forth. with most of them, their names were all we knew of them, and what we knew of them from their letters to us and their messages to each other, and, over the years mike and i have only had a chance to meet a few of them "in real life" at conventions and such.

of course, regular readers of this blog will recognize kojee's name--he's stuck with me on the journey here to the perhapanauts (thanks, kojee!) and has helped out in ways i can't thank him enough for!

also lurking about--but not posting as much--maybe it's that stupid sign up to comment--i hate that figaro. our pal, john norris, is a composer by day, doing a lot of work with his church (and even put together a beautiful opening piece for our much dreamed on tellos movie...), but at night he takes on the guise of avid comics reader and reviewer. his column for comics in the classroom dot net is geared to guide teachers and parents toward comics that would be appropriate for their kids and hopefully fun for the whole family. he has been kind enough cover the perhapanauts in his travels and below is a link (or at least the web address) so that you can check it out yourselves!
thanks for the great coverage, fig--and for your never-ending enthusiasm!

also, news on the perhapanauts front is that issue 4 of second chances will be bumped a week due to shuffling going on at the printers for the holidays. so rather than a just-before-christmas gift, consider it a pre-new years treat!

well, i gotta go and write some funny books!
smell ya later!

Monday, November 27, 2006

oh, so ya have some questions about the perhapanauts:second chances #2...?


apparently issue 2 of our current endeavor has prompted a whole mess a' questions and, while i absolutely LOVE getting your emails, myspace messages, and, in a few cases, phone calls, i, sadly, must also plead the fifith as far as the answers go. you don't REALLY want me to tell you who those two guys in the suv are...? or what it is that choopie told choopie? or why the cricket squad features a second-in-command who bears a strinking resemblance to a certain member of our perhapa-blog family here...? (well, actually, that one's easy--we really wanted to thank brian for all he's done in promoting the perhapanauts. and, also, we want to kill him in an upcoming issue.)

so, yes, there is lots going on. a lot more than in the first series. and yes, there are a lot of questions to be asked, but, patient. it will all make sense soon enough. (if you really MUST know, okay...'e' me and i'll letcha know what i can...i'm such a pushover...)

as far as news goes, craig just got done updating the perhapanauts website (if you didn't get here by going through that, check it out. it looks wonderful!)
the big news really though is that he's added a fan art/fan fic section where you are now welcomed and encouraged to share your perhapanaut-related drawings, comics, and/or stories with alla your perhapa-pals!! don't be shy--the more the merrier! we're dying to see your versions of our little gang and can't wait to read your short (or long) stories and see what kinda wackiness YOU can get them into! feel free! have fun!
we've already posted some pin-ups by don kelly, mek, and philippe and a great six-page 'haps comics story by my friend, jj muste!
send any submissions YOU might have to
and he'll get 'em up there as soon as possible!

also, i think my interview with MIKE WIERINGO in his volume of MODERN MASTERS is out this week! (at least, i THINK it is...i got a whole box of 'em yesterday...) so go get one and enjoy retrospect on the career and artwork of one of the best artists in comics today! (and yes, i can't wait 'til they let me do one on craig! woo hoo!)

i hope everybody had a great thanksgiving and that you made the most of relaxing over the long weekend. i did.

smell ya later!

Thursday, November 23, 2006

kojee's letter


hope everybody had a great and grateful thanksgiving!
i also hope that you're making the most of the long weekend and spending some time resting and relaxing with family and friends.

for todays blog i wanted to give some credit where credit is due and give an extra special shout out to our pal, kojee.
here's why.

most of you have prob'ly tipped to the fact that i write alla the letters on the perhapanotes pages of the perhapanauts. those letters usually refer to an issue that never was. or never will be. (or WILL they...? : ) anyway, i try to use those letters to tell--or maybe a better term would be 'elude to'--stories that either wouldn't work well as a comic book story or reveal a little something extra about one or another of our players. i have a lotta fun doing them and wonder if anyone reads them.

back in january, inspired by the idea, brian mulcahy wrote to craig and i explaining how much he loved our 100th issue. the letter was a kick--you can see it in second chances 2--and craig and i got several good laughs out of it! i thought, we HAVE to share this, and then asked a few of our other regular perhapablog-pals if they would like to take a swing at it, building on the fun that brian had laid down. i asked jason copland, scott weinstein (who signed as b.clinton : ) and kojee/jared, our tellos friend from long ago. they all laid down some sweet sweet letter parodies and i loved them all. sent 'em in...

...only to find that, because of space, dark horse needed to cut one of the letters.
it was kojee's.
i felt terrible.
and so, here, for your edification and amusement, please enjoy kojee's letter on our glorious 100th issue!

Dear Perhapa-dudes,

Congrats on reaching 100 issues! I've been with the book since day one, and the story just keeps getting better and better! I was heartbroken over Choopie, but he died to save his friends, and the way he died only added to his character.

Sadly, I read online that Craig will be giving up pencilling duties after issue 110. I know he's busy with the Harry Johnson movie adaptation(loved Craig's cameo in the film!), but I'm still gonna miss his style. Is it true that Joe Mad is interested in taking over as artist?

As a big fan of the first Perhapanauts movie, I have to say, please, do not let Universal allow Angelina Jolie to walk out before film number two. Pay her whatever she wants. She fit Molly perfectly, despite what Todd wrote on his blog. Man, Todd starts dating Jessica Alba, and suddenly he's a film critic? Whatever....

Rock on!


thanks, kojee--for the awesome letter and for being so understanding!
have a great weekend!
smell ya later!

i will point out that, while it's nice that everyone sees me attached to some very talented actresses in the future--and that scott remembered jennifer connelly...and her picture on my fridge...i am currently dating a very nice girl named sharon and am very happy where i am.
so jennifer, please stop calling.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006



perhapanauts:second chances #2 is on sale NOW!!

why don't you have one yet?

don't give me THAT lame excuse...! you get out there and GET ONE!

it's not gonna read itself, y'know.

perhapanauts:second chances #2 on sale now!

have a great thanksgiving!
see ya friday!

Sunday, November 19, 2006

a weeks worth of thanks and don kelly


well, as the title of this little blog suggests, i've realized in recent years that the holiday season seems to go too fast. always griping about how the stores get their decorations and advertisings and sales out WAY too early--to my mind it should be illegal until just after thanksgiving--this year i'm not letting it get me. as a matter of fact, i think i'm embracing it a bit. we NEED to get into the spirit of the holidays, of giving and sharing and smiling and putting away petty differences. personally, i have SO much to be thankful for and i don't wanna let this thanksgiving go by without acknowledging that and hopefully telling the people i care about how i feel.
okay, blah, blah, blah--you know what i mean. you've heard it before. prob'ly even said it before.
but, anyway, here's what i'm gonna do. and if anyone else feels like they wanna do it too, then i'm glad i wrote about it.
tonight--that's sunday for me, but it could be monday or tuesday, whenver you read this--i'm gonna sit in the dark in my living room, with my dog in my lap, and i'm just gonna list all the friends and family i have, the people who, whether i ever call on them or not, i know would be there for me in a heartbeat. i'm gonna list all the great things i have in my life--just watching one of those (guilt-inducing) christian children's fund commercials will help you remember just how good you got it. and finally, i'm gonna list a buncha things that i'm going to do to better myself. or my friends. or someone i don't even know.
i'm gonna be thankful.
i've got a whole week to work on it.

that said, one of the things that i am ALWAYS thankful for is being able to tell stories, especially with craig, and especially for you. there are many other places where we would never have the opportunity to do the perhapanauts and i feel very fortunate that we've been able to do what we have. i'm also thankful for YOU--whether you're a fan of our crazy crytozoological team or you just happened to stumble on this blog and have nothing better to do with your time--thanks for reading!

someone who DOES have better things to do with his time, but reads our book anyway, is don a. kelly. don is an artist/cartoonist based in new england and just the other day posted a sketch he did of our molly over on his blog! craig forwarded it over to me and, as i've said many times before, it's an absolutely wonderful feeling to see other people's versions of your characters, to know that they liked them enough to take the time and draw them. i had every intention of posting his molly here, but thought that that would take away the incentive for you to go over to don's blog and check out all of his other wonderful stuff! he has a style that's a lot of fun and you can see his love of comics in his work!

so check it out--here's his e-ddress--

and that's it for today!
perhapanauts:second chances #2 is s'posed to be out this week--are the books coming in on tuesday or wednesday? i dunno.

since i didn't want to post don's picture here--go check it out already, will ya!--
here's a picture of jake sleeping in his bed...

smell ya later!

Thursday, November 16, 2006

solicits: perhapanauts:second chances #4


here's the last one!
if you liked these, well i hope this one leaves you on a good note.
if you hated this, i'll be back to regular blog next week!

have a great weekend!

i think, for reasons i really can't put my finger on, that this is my favorite cover so far!
love the design, the figures, the coloring...
great job, craig!


(writer) todd dezago
(pencils&inks) craig rousseau
(color) rico renzi

This issue; Everything Happens!


“From the slightly deranged and feverishly creative minds of Todd Dezago and Craig Rousseau…”
--Augie de Blieck, Jr., Comic Book Resources

“…good clean comics fun.”
--Augie de Blieck, Jr., Comic Book Resources

“…it would be a shame to see it get lost in the flood of new titles arriving on shelves these days.”
--Augie de Blieck, Jr., Comic Book Resources

“…even the letters column continues the mirth and mayhem of the comic.”
--Augie de Blieck, Jr., Comic Book Resources

“#@&%!! Can’t you guys find anybody else to pimp your crappy book?!?”
--Augie de Blieck, Jr., Comic Book Resources

FC 32 pp $2.99

okay, i'm off to watch my name is earl, the office, 30 rock (all super-sized!!) and er.
smell ya later!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

solicits: perhapanauts:second chances #3


as the rumble continues to reverberate around, well, my inbox and mike's website, about the tellos hardcover news i spilled the other night on augie's podcast, i'm gonna go ahead and continue posting the solicits for second chances 'cause i really don't know how to respond to all of the e-mails of congratulations and thank yous and it's-about-flippin'-times.

thank you to all of you who've let us know that this is a good thing.

now, onto the solicits for 3...

as you can see, i hadda do this one twice too. dave just felt that this first one was a little too out there. i can see that--could see it even before i sent it in--but thought it was worth a try, right? i originally wrote it with a font that duplicated, what i considered, a teenage girl's loopy, angsty scrawl. it just LOOKS funny. unfortunately, dave couldn't guarantee that they could duplicate it in previews just as i can't duplicate it here. sorry. take my word for it. it's funny.


(writer) todd dezago
(pencils&inks) craig rousseau
(color) rico renzi

Dear Diary,
I don ‘t know what I’m gonna do. I try and I try but I just can’t seem to get anyone to notice me. I don’t There are SO many comic books on the racks and they all look so pretty...prettier then me, anyway. All the popular books are so bright and colorful. And I can tell they laugh at me behind my back cover. Those books SUCK! Oh, I wish I could be like them, Diary. I wish I was popular. I wish someone would see me and want to pick me up and read me. What can I do?! How can I get them to NOTICE ME?!

Ps.OmiGOD! I think Truth, Justin, and the American Way is leaning toward me. What should I do? >he’s so cuuute!<


FC 32 pp $2.99

i then drew kind of a blank on what to do next, but soon found myself explaining the sitch to my good pal/hero/mentor/adoptive father, nick cardy

who gave me the following.


(writer) todd dezago
(pencils&inks) craig rousseau
(color) rico renzi

Have you ever written a story featuring a blood-thirsty Chupacabra, a Sasquatch, a Ghost, a Telepath, and a mysterious Outsider who work as agents for a vast secret organization dedicated to policing the borders of the unknown and protecting an unknowing populace from the strange and bizarre creatures that sporadically break through?
Well, we have and we think you should buy it.

Note: From optimum enjoyment, The Perhapanauts:Second Chances #3 is best read with a flashlight in a tent in your backyard on a dark summers night with a friend, a can of warm root beer and a bag of pretzel rods.
(Also, there is one mosquito in the tent.)
(And it is the size of a small dog.)

FC 32 pp $2.99

i added the note at the end.
to me, THAT'S the way to read a comic book!

(except for the mosquito.)

so that's it.
number 4 tomorrow.
smell ya later!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

solicits: perhapanauts:second chances #2


postponing our regularly scheduled solicit parade for a paragraph or two here, i thought it would only be right to let you know that i was honored to be asked by our pal, augie de blieck, to do a podcast interview on his celebrated "pipeline podcast" last week...and it's up!
right now!

augie's been doing his column, the pipeline, at CBR ( for YEARS and these podcasts for quite a while now too (i've only been listening since i got hi-speed a few months ago), but if you want to spend a little time with someone who loves comics and can still get excited about them, you should check out augie's "show" (posted every tuesday night!) also, augie's got a great radio voice!

you can check out augie's column and show notes here:

and because of something i SAID during the interview, you can check out this little story here:

thanks, augie! you're the best!
(subscribe to augie's weekly podcast through CBR or through itunes!)

now back to the promised solicits for issue #2 of perhapanauts:second chances...

here's the first solicit i submitted for issue 2.
craig and rico had done such a great job on the choopie butt card that i though we should share it with all the previews readers as well. dave asked for something different because a change in format of the solicits meant that we wouldn't have the room to reproduce the card image. oh, well...


(writer) todd dezago
(pencils&inks) craig rousseau
(color) rico renzi

In keeping with our tradition of not spilling even the slightest detail of what happens in upcoming issues of the perhapanauts, we thought it might be fun to give YOU, our loyal, intelligent--and, might I add, attractive--Readers, this fun and funny gag to share with friends and family! Introducing the “CHOOPIE BUTT CARD”…!
Here’s how it works:

Step 1: Cut out the Choopie Butt Card.
Step b: Cut out Choopie’s butt.
Step 3: Place over curled forefinger.
Step 5: Ta da! You’re Welcome!
(now go show yer Mom.)

(card goes here)

Also, don’t forget to order lots of

(“choopie butt card” copyright © 2K6 todd dezago&craig rousseau)

FC 32 pp $2.99

so here is my second pass that, i'm pretty sure, ran as written.


(writer) todd dezago
(pencils&inks) craig rousseau
(color) rico renzi

In keeping with our tradition of not spilling even the slightest detail of what happens in upcoming issues of the perhapanauts, we humbly submit the following totally fake listing. Enjoy!

Tonight on The PERHAPANAUTS: Second Chances--
Big wakes up in the shower only to find out that the past three issues were all a dream! While on vacation in Las Vegas, Molly and MG accidentally get married by an ordained Elvis. And Choopie becomes attached to a stray dog only to be heartbroken when the owner arrives to claim him. Choopie and the little boy argue over who loves the pooch more, but eventually Choopie does (almost) the right thing and returns the little dog to the boy–
–sans blood.

FC 32 pp $2.99
that's it!
more tomorrow!

Monday, November 13, 2006

solicits: perhapanauts:second chances #1


as promised, i'm gonna post the complete and uncut solicits for each of the four second chances books over the next four days. also as promised, these are the edited and/or unused (rejected) versions that, obviously, either ran long or just were too out there and dave (land, our awesome editor at dark horse) was astute enough to reel me in. in any case, they should be funny or at least fun and i hope you enjoy them.
unfortunately, today's--this first one--really isn't that funny. not at all actually. so you'll just have to take my word that the rest are a lot funnier and check them out tomorrow. and thursday. and friday.
anyway, here's the solicit for #1.

perhapanauts:second chances #1
(writer) todd dezago
(pencils&inks) craig rousseau
(color) rico renzi

They’re BACK! Still glowing from the heat of their first mind-numbing miniseries, those prowlers of the paranormal--The PERHAPANAUTS--are back to confront more creepy cryptozoological creatures and extradimensional entities! (No, the fact that the team is mostly made up of same mythic monsters isn’t lost on us…)
A Bigfoot, a chupacabra, a ghost, and a psychic, all agents for the enigmatic BEDLAM (Bureau of ExtraDimensional Liabilities and Management), tear it up as they continue the fight to keep us safe from the unseen horrors in our closets and the things that go bump in the night!
Don’t miss out! Join The Perhapanauts as they delve into the mysteries of the unknown and the unexplained and answer questions like why there’re more lines on your left palm than on your right!
Order yours today!
Also, stop looking at your hand.

FC 32 pp $2.99

really, there are two for issue 2 and they're better...
see ya tomorrow.

solicitations and the bearwolf


well, as brian and i know--and maybe some of you have heard about it over the weekend--apparently there is SOME kind of mysterious creature lurking about in washington county out in wisconsin.
reports on friday claimed that a man working for the state and responsible for keeping the highways clear of roadkill carcasses (at night, no less!) reported seeing (a) bigfoot coming out of the woods and claiming a recently killed deer before the man could haul it away. later, it would turn out that the man NEVER used the term "bigfoot"--that was the news people making it viewer friendly--but that it was more of a "bearwolf" sort of thing, walking on two legs and standing close to seven feet tall.

illustration by linda godfrey

to follow the whole story here's the link to linda's blog that brian (mulcahy) hooked me up with.

i had read, thanks to jason copland, an account a while ago about the recurrent sightings of a wolf-like creature which locals have called "the bray road beast". and though i thought i'd posted that story and link at some point, i'm having some trouble tracking it down. is there a werewolf of some sorts stalking the forests of wisconsin? check it out...

that should give ya some creepy reading for a bit...

on then, to the next topic for discussion; for a long time now people have been telling me that i should collect the rather silly and/or sarcastic solicits that i write for each issue of the perhapanauts and put 'em in a sketchbook or something. 'cause they're--apparently--funny.
maybe i'll do that.
for now though, i thought i'd post them here this week, one or two each day. this is knida the director's cut as some of them had to be edited down for space and some were rejected completely by dark horse as being a little just too out there. that's okay...they were all fun to write.
here, then, for anyone who's interested, are the original solicits for issues 2, 3, and 4 of the first perhapanauts series.
smell ya later.

todd and craig’s
(w) todd dezago
(a) craig rousseau
(b) rico renzi

Hey, perhapa-pals!--Todd Dezago here.
I really don’t want to date myself
but, y’know, I can remember a time
when there wasn’t any PREVIEWS. No solicitations,
no cover image, no three sentence encapsulation that
sorta dilutes the thrills of an upcoming story. Back then
the only way you knew what your hero was in store
for next month was on the last panel of this month’s
issue! Like; Next Issue: The Rhino!
It was enticing! It was exciting!
Don’t get me wrong--I love PREVIEWS--it’s a wonderful
publication. However, in honor of those bygone days, we here
at the perhapanauts will be using this space to introduce ourselves,
preview some awesome artwork, and maybe tell a few jokes.
Check back here next month for some of that kind of fun.

Oh, and please check out the perhapanauts #2 for a comic
that’s packed with adventure, chills, and excitement!
After all, we do it for you.

FC 32 pp $2.99

todd and craig’s
(w) todd dezago
(a) craig rousseau
(b) rico renzi

In our continuing effort to NOT tell you what happens
in upcoming issues, today we field a letter from
one of our avid Readers.

Dear Perhapa-dudes,
Since the chupacabra originally
comes out of Latin-American folklore, shouldn’t
Choopie speak with an outrageous Mexican accent
like Speedy Gonzales?
“He like my seester, I theenk.”
It would be so much funnier like that.
Your numero uno amigo--
Davy Glasmer
Dengen’s Creek, Iowa

Dear Davy~
Good question.
And, no, it's not stupid at all...
But no.
While the legend of the goatsucker
does have it’s origins in Central American culture,
Choopie was just a blood-sucking beast when he was first
captured. It wasn’t until he was exposed to the Evolvo-Ray
that Choopie began to develop basic language skills.
He was then exposed to countless hours of American television.
That’s where he learned to talk.

Thanks for writing and don’t forget to order the perhapanauts #3.
It will be much better than this solicit.
And it’ll have pictures.
todd and craig

FC 32pp $2.99

todd and craig’s
(w) todd dezago
(a) craig rousseau
(b) rico renzi

On sale February 15, FC 32pg. $2.99

A chupacabra, a sasquatch, and a ghost walk into a bar…

Okay, maybe not…

Hey, Perhapa-Pals! Todd and Craig here.
As we strive valiantly to continue NOT telling
you what’s coming up in upcoming issues, we
will say this about the perhapanauts #4.

It’s very good.


Trust us.

We’ve seen it and we think it’s one of the
most thrilling, pulse-pounding, senses-shattering,
low-in-calories, action-packed, sci-fi-slash-
adventure comics being offered this month,
from Dark Horse, on this page, by us.

Check it out and see if you don’t agree!

Order a perhapanauts #4 today--you’ll be glad you did!

more tomorrow!

Friday, November 10, 2006

jason's 24 hour comic and empty chamber


tried desperately to post this this morning but there was just so much going on today--different things all around--and i just didn't get to do it.

but it's still friday so i feel like i'm still on schedule. call this post something to carry you through the weekend...

and really all i wanna do today is point you toward jason's blog and comics and stuff.

our good pal, jason copland, i mean.
a few weeks back i made mention of jason's comic book 'empty chamber' that he does with writer a. david lewis, a 2-issue black and white suspense noir that i just loved! well, i loved the first part of it...i'm dying to see the second half. jason had sent me a preview copy months ago and i dug it, orderd it through diamond, and now patiently await the conclusion. (apparently the publisher thought that putting a couple months between issues 1 and 2 would help sales...?) anyway, it's good stuff and i urge(d) everybody to check it out.

so i knew jason could draw.

what i DIDN'T know was that jason was a damn fine storyteller too! and ambitious!
so when jason e'd me to tell me that he'd done one of those 24 hour comic book challenges, i was certainly impressed by his enthusiasm. when i saw the RESULT...i was completely floored!

okay, so the idea is that you, the artist, set aside a 24 hour period--that's 24 consecutive hours, kids--and, going in cold, with no pre-written script or sketches, write and draw a complete 24 page story.
i don't think i could do it.

but jason did and when he sent me a link, i immediately asked if i could post it here.

here are the first three pages and the link to where you can see the rest. do yourself a favor and check it out. i'm just in awe of what he was able to do in such a short time under such intense circumstances.

here's what he had to say when i asked him how he did it...

"Yeah, I managed to finish the 24 pages in just over 23 hours. It was quite a feat to make sure that I could get it to end on the 24th page. The hardest part of it though was the writing of it. I started the 24 hours with absolutely no preconceived ideas about story or characters. So all of it was made up on the fly. I used a few of the album titles of the cd's I was listening to to help spark some ideas as to where the story should go. As a matter of fact, the very first word of the comic is the title of the first album I listened to. :)

"It was about an hour per page but a few of the pages took less than that... page 22 took about 20 minutes... but the first 3-4 pages are scary because you don't really know what kind of pace you should be working at. Especially if you are making it up as you go and you don't have an ending all worked out. I spent a whack of time near the end just sitting there trying to come up with an ending. I almost thought I wasn't going to come up with an ending! Luckily, I figured it out in time to draw it. :)"

i'm amazed, jason...and you should be proud.
really great!

if you wanna tell jason what you think, or check out his blog and some of his other stuff, head on over to:

have a great weekend, all!
smell ya later!

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

men in black


as our own bedlam-based men in black make a return in the upcoming second chances #2, i thought now would be a good time to post yet another hair-raising tale garnered from (my favorite) regarding these ultra-creepy mystery men.
the first time i remember hearing (or rather reading) about the men in black was probably 10 years ago when my pal terry austin loaned me his copy of "the mothman prophecies". (if you saw the movie and think you know it, check out the book. the movie did a nice job--i think--of making a story out of all of john keel's brilliant investigative reporting, but there is certainly much more to the case--and the men in black--than what you saw on the screen.) the men in black hounded not only keel, but many of the town residents who reported sightings of the enigmatic mothman and have been attached to ufo sightings and bizarre occurances since the early '50's.

but check this out...

Your True Tales July 2006

Men-in-Black Encounter
by Anonymous

I had an extremely frightening experience five years ago that I had no idea what was going on, but when I happened to run across a description of the Men-in-Black (MIB) (which I had never even heard about except for passing references to the Will Smith movie), I suddenly realized this is extremely similar to what I experienced. My mouth dropped open at the similarity.
I used to be a postal delivery person in Washington, D.C. One of the buildings I always delivered mail to on my route was this huge building. One day I had paused to eat an apple outside the building, and not seeing a trash can anywhere, I just threw the core onto the ground. When I walked into the building to deliver the mail, I was angrily confronted by the head security guy who asked me why I was littering. I was a little taken aback and asked him how he knew I had thrown the apple core on the ground. He told me that this whole premises was under video surveillance, including not only all sides of the building, but even the grassy areas around it.
It was then that I suddenly realized this building had really unusually tight security. Even when I went inside to deposit the mail, the mailroom was open to me, but the rest of the building was inaccessible. I could only go into the mailroom, deposit the mail, and leave. I had to ring a buzzer to be let into the building each time I delivered.
A few weeks later, I was on my way to deliver the mail as usual to the building, and as I was nearing the building, I saw three figures crossing the street on their way toward the building. At first glance I thought they were normal. But as I looked closer, I was shocked at how strange they were: they were extremely thin, and they didn't walk by putting one leg in front of the other, but sort of waddled by moving their whole bodies from side to side, lifting one foot off the ground, then the other foot in a sort of whole-body side-to-side waddle. It's hard to explain what I mean, but it was not the way any normal person would walk unless they were unable to move any joint in their legs. But as strange as this was, this was not what frightened me. What frightened me was that they were absolutely thin. It was like they were as flat as a set of clothes that had been ironed. Their faces and bodies were entirely flat - no contours. The nose did not jut out, nothing. And they were also extremely thin. The best I could describe is if you saw a suit hanging from a clothes hanger, that would be about the same thickness. It was like no thickness at all, just clothes hanging from a hanger.
All three were dressed in black suits. They all had black sunglasses. I saw them walk up, ring the buzzer, and be let into the building. I was absolutely scared s***less as I had just been about to enter that very same building. I really wasn't sure what to do, but I kind of steeled myself, and slowly forced myself to ring the buzzer and enter the building, figuring, hey, I might have imagined this, in any case I should force myself to go through my routine until I can think this thing out.
When I entered the mailroom, there were 10 (normal) men standing there, just looking at me. It was really intimidating. They asked me if I had seen anything. I was kind of speechless for a second, not knowing how to respond. And then one of THEM walked right up to me from the side and from slightly behind me. I could tell it was one of the same types of things that I had seen crossing the street. It walked right up to me and I was too afraid to turn my head to the side and look at it. I am being very scared just typing this right now, remembering it. It didn't say anything, it just got right up close to me, and I had a feeling of fear so intense, I felt as if my heart had just frozen and was going to fall out of my body onto the ground.
Again, they asked me, "Did you see anything? What did you see?" I just shook my head and stammered, "No, I didn't see anything." Unless they were all mentally challenged there is no way they couldn't have noticed my extreme fright. I thought they might hold me there and not let me go. But finally they said, "Okay, leave now." And the MIB that was to my side and a little behind me, kind of took a step back to make way, and I had to steel myself, it is the bravest thing I've ever done in my life, to actually walk past it on my way to the door. And I was out of the building.
At the time I had never heard of the MIB. I had no idea what this thing was or what the government was doing. All I knew was that I was dealing with something far more powerful than me. I thought maybe it was some new type of robot and the government was doing test-runs on them, but why that would be done in broad daylight I could not and still do not understand.
To give you an understanding of how frightening it was, the first thought that came to my mind was that I needed to leave the country - to find some way to get the hell out of the country and go somewhere else - but then it occurred to me that if I started to act strangely, they might get suspicious and kill me or something. I realized the best thing I could do was act as normally as possible and pretend nothing had happened.
Later the next week, my supervisor at the post office told me I had been suddenly reassigned from my old route to a new one, something that was unexpected. He asked me if I had encountered any problems on the route. I think even he may have been a little confused at why I was being reassigned. But I said I had no problems and I was very quiet about it. So eventually I got reassigned. After what I thought was an appropriate amount of time continuing to work at the post office, I quit my job and now I work at an airport. I am telling this story now because five years later I need to get this off my chest.
I doubt they will come after me now but if they do, I can't avoid my fate. I've never seen any sort of alien or had any sort of unusual life event of any other kind, nor do I believe that there is such a thing as a devil or demons or anything. So I really don't know what to believe now. There is no doubt whatsoever the building was under the control of the government, with normal human beings. I still think it was some sort of cyborg experiment, and on occasion I still am tempted to just leave the country to get away from all this.

as i type this, i think there's someone at the door.
or maybe at your door.

see ya friday!

Sunday, November 05, 2006

starting the week out right...


i have, obviously, been a bit spotty with my posts in the past few weeks, trying desperately to adhere to a monday, wednesday, friday schedule. sure i had a few busy weeks there where i was working days with my friend, jeff, but otherwise, i've done a fairly good job of keeping up.
i think.

a couple of weeks ago, i made a mention as to how i'd really like this blog--which is called the PERHAPA-blog--to be mainly about the perhapanauts and all things related; comics, weird and bizarre creatures and phenomenae, scary stuff, movies, tv, etc., and not really so much about me. sure i'll throw my 2¢ in here and there--it's tough to be completely objective--but not like the "cult of me" that i see so many writers--and some artists--cultivating on their sites. should i ever even begin to sound like that, i would hope that someone, mike or craig--or more than likely it would be brian--would reel me in and smack me up.

that said, the reason that most of last week went by without a post was because, basically, i just couldn't think of anything to post! everything i was doing last week was something off-topic, something that I was enjoying, but didn't feel that EVERYBODY would enjoy hearing about. so i stalled...and stalled...and stalled...and here it is sunday night and i want nothing more than to start this week off right.

so i have some things lined up and i hope you like 'em!

first off, as you all know, second chances #1 is out and is getting some really nice press! many people i know, both personally and internetally, have told me that they thought that second chances #1 was head and shoulders above the first series. that's okay--we like that! that's what we were shootin' for!

others have told me that they've read it several times and have found some new things with each reading! we were shootin' for that too! (although craig and i are a bit surprised that no one has picked up on some of the really hidden stuff yet...although i guess that's okay, 'cause we DID hide them...) maybe you need to take another look...

also, people have pointed out the newly expanded cast. in this issue we've introduced some new faces at bedlam; dr. trish sheehan--head of psychiatric, dr. baldeev das--head of biologics and botash, dr. michael o'neil--crypto. (these are all based--and in most cases named--after actual people, as is bedlam's psychic "den mother", joann). next issue, we'll be introducing a few more new faces--a couple of very familiar ones--as well as the return of the men in black.

hope you'll join us.

and speaking of men in black, be here wednesday for a creepy story about these incredibly sinister beings--much more sinister than what will smith and tommy lee jones have made them out to be...
like i said, creepy...
gotta go!
smell ya later!