Friday, December 29, 2006

goodbye to 2K6! hello 2007!!


the holidays can be a time of great reflection for many people and, sadly, i think that has a direct relation to why so many people get so depressed about now. looking back on an entire year, sometimes it's hard to see all the high points and accomplishments and all the good times. things can look kinda sad.
but, to quote a line from the amazing (except for the last 10 minutes) james cameron film, "the abyss", "you have to look with better eyes than that."

this year was a particularly good one for you and you know it!
okay, go ahead--list for me the three BEST things that happened to you in 2006...
take a minute if you need it--i'll wait...

i'm not kidding! don't just keep reading--THINK OF THEM!!!

there, ya got three?

that wasn't so hard , was it?

betcha can do three more...

easy, right?

here's some things that i got to do.

i got to go see saturday night live--TWICE!! thanks to my pal, scott. (THANKS, SCOTT!)
i got to go to the conventions in charlotte and baltimore with my pals and partners, craig and mike!
and scott in charlotte!
and brian in baltimore!
i got to go swimming and dick around with my nephew a few times this summer.
i went exploring up a stream with my niece and nephew.
i got to have sushi many times.
i got to see the second half of the first perhapanauts miniseries published in the first part of the year and the first part of the second perhapanauts miniseries published in the second part of the year.
i got to go for a walk and play with my dog, jake, everyday.
i made a lot of new friends and a couple of great ones.
i got to play volleyball on a pretty regular basis.

and, though this should be at the top of the list but is at the bottom to surprise her, i got back together with sharon and have spent hours and hours and days hanging out with her and that's the best of them all! thanks, shar!

for 2007, my resolution is really the same one i make every year--to be a better person. to treat people with more kindness. to understand that life is about making mistakes and hoping that i'll have the patience and insight to stop and learn from mine.

i wish you all the best in the new year!
thanks for reading this and for reading the perhapanauts!

now here are some goofy pictures to lighten this freakin' blog up...!

also, a few weeks ago i ran our own brian mulcahy's perhapanauts script/story, "down in the dump".
in looking for someone who might want to do a few illustrations for it, we talked with michael kasinger, who was thrilled at the possibilities. fortunately for him, (unfortunate for us) just as he was beginning his illos, michael was tapped to work on another comics project and so had to put this one on the shelf. not wanting to leave us empty-haned though, michael just sent us this black and white cover/pin-up of choopie! here are the black and white and the colored versions! great job, michaeal! thanks so much for the great pic to kick off the new year!!

okay. that's it for me.
wednesday's gonna be all about perhapanauts:second chances #3--don't miss it!
and once you've had a chance to read the story, check out the "inside look" i wrote to go with it over at

i gotta go!
smell ya later!

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

no good comics...


after racing around for a week and a half, buying presents, wrapping them, writing cards, wrapping them, unwrapping them--you don't wrap cards...i was really looking forward to being able to finally relax on christmas day. that was gonna be part of the magic, part of the pay-off. but , of course, THAT day is a bit hectic too. packing the car and going here and there to share in the magic of the day with family and friends and, yeah, maybe even a few people you don't really like.
none of that last for me--i had a wonderful day with everyone i saw and came home fully stuffed (the diet starts wednesday) and fully exhausted!
hope you did too! : )

and as we hang here in this lazy listless void between christmas and new year's, i really don't know what to write about. how thankful i am that i was ABLE to spend such a wonderful time with family and friends? too sentimental. that perhapanauts: second chances #3 will be out in stores next wednesday? too commercial. more trivia? well, that might be too exciting. i am gonna try to make that a regular event here though, 'cause i got the impression that it was fun for all. i enjoyed writing them and you all enjoyed answering them. maybe we'll do a "five on friday" kinda thing...

so i thought i'd point out--without dissing anyone currently in the business--that daily comics totally SUCK anymore, don't they?! i mean this is just my opinion, and i am wrong more times than not, but jeez! have these guys ever even read a classic peanuts strip? a dennis the menace one-panel? a calvin and hobbes?

now i don't read the paper and if you ever see me with one in my hand it's gonna be because i'm reading the comics. i used to do it all the time, back when there was something fun to read. but i've been looking the past few months when at my father's house and...come on...really?

are there any good comic strips being done these days? is it just me? am i in some cultural vaccuum where i'm just not being exposed to the cream of the crop? i get bc and the wizard of id on my yahoo front page everyday and they just hurt! (fortunately i also subscribe to a site that sends me 10, 12 year old calvin and hobbes strips that, as you can see, are funny STILL, after i've seen them each about 6 times!!)

schulz and watterson, kelly and hasen--are there no masters of the art like these guys working in the medium anymore? these were some clever, exciting, beautiful strips that made me race to the comics section in their day! is anyone reading something now that captures their hearts and imaginations like these guys did? i really wanna know.

i really hate to follow up such warm holidays and good times with a rant about something like this. i don't mean to seem unthankful or angry. i'm not. i'm just wondering what everyone else thinks about this and, who knows, maybe there are some strips out there that my paper just doesn't get, that i haven't been tipped to. so lemme know if you know of any, if you're reading something that really rates some attention or shows some potential in this area.

have a great day!
smell ya later!

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

more scared of santa


as i write this there are still a few presents in the other room that are crying to be wrapped, christmas cards waiting to be sent (always some new friends that have added you to their list so...), and friends that i need to call. scott and mike especially--mike your package arrived, did mine?, scott--yes, whenever. i'll call ya tomorrow. also, i gotta call heather...

this whole blog will feature random pictures of the week as we continue with the "Scared of Santa" photos. hope ya dig 'em. i do. not that little kids crying makes me laugh but...well, sometimes they DO! : D

if you are still undecided what to get that special girl in your life, here's a suggestion from this week's saturday night live, courtesy of andy samburg and justin timberlake. just a thought. (scott, craig--i can't stop watching this...!)

something else that i just can't get enough of is the new weird al (yankovic) album, "straight outta lynwood". craig sent it to me last week and though i've been trying to listen to as many christmas tunes as possible to get in the spirit, i keep finding myself singing "weasel stomping day" instead of "winter wonderland"! check it out if you can! also, as usual, weird al's videos are hilarious!

a week or so ago i bought the audio book "the stupidest angel: a heartwarming tale of christmas terror" by christopher moore. don't miss it! sharon and i listened to it in the car going back and forth to the city to see scott (albeit briefly) and snl. we laughed the whole time! check it out if you wanna listen to some twisted holiday fun. also, they'll probably make a movie of it for next year. that's my prediction.
moore wrote a couple other books of which i've only read one. my (ex-girl-) best friend, dani, turned me onto "lamb--the gospel according to biff, christ's childhood friend". sacreligious? you would think, but, no. hilarious? damn right!

i realize that i am all "merry christmas!" and not getting as much "happy hannukah!"ing or "happy kwanza!"ing out there! but please know that i wish everyone the joy, peace, and love that the SEASON brings--that we can ALL join together in brotherhood no matter what or how we celebrate!
also, i just don't know any good kwanza or hannukah jokes...

i've been trying to get into the spirit but it's been tough with the lack of winter weather here. snow would help. a white christmas is always nice. it's also very hard because--and i really don't want anyone to respond to this--but this is the first year we are celebrating christmas without my mother. we lost her very close to the beginning of last year to cancer and, while last year was very sad and less-than-merry because of her sickness, this year is just very hard. she WAS our family, and though we are all very close--closer now through our loss--she is sorely missed.
as i said, please don't respond to this--just appreciate your family and loved ones this year, and all year.
and let them know.

happy hannukah!
merry christmas!
happy kwanza!
season's greetings!
smell ya later!

the holiday rush


list (note: real men do not need lists)
shopping (note: real men are ususally found still doing this at 10 pm on christmas eve)
wrapping (men--allow extra 45 minutes due to "scotch tape accidents")

***or, if you fancy yourself a bit creative, like i do (i'm kidding myself)
~~home made
coming up with an idea (allow 6 months)
drawing/painting (3 or 4 times--throw out if "just not good enough"...)
finding envelopes

find box of christmas decorations
find old sticky candy cane melted to side of box
(oh wait...CLEANING first,
then decorating)
(cut down?) (bring a good saw.) (and a pair of heavy gloves.) (and someone to cut the tree down for you.)
bring home
set in stand (trim bottom 24 to 30 times untilk you get it just right...and tree is now 2' high.)
lights (sucker.)
decorate--ornaments, tinsel (remember to "drape" tinsel one strand at a time to simutlate icicles. sucker.)
dig out of closet
set up (like opening an umbrella, isn't it?)
lights (unless you just left 'em on from last year)
decorate--ornaments, tinsel

i'm a little behind schedule, but i'm definitely on my way.
hope you're all doing well.


smell ya later!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

happy holidays!!


while we have trivia hangin'--and probably more to come...everybody seems to like this--i DO want to take a moment to acknowledge the holidays and wish everyone a happy and a merry!
the lack of snow here in the northeast--and unseasonably warm weather--has made it a little more difficult to get into the spirit around here, but after doing some christmas shopping with my brother yesterday, i've found a little of it. in the faces of people in the stores, at the mall.
i know that sounds like a truly commercial and non-traditional place to find it, but after trying desperately--and futilely--to conjur up thoughts of love and kindness and brotherhood and peace on earth here at home, all i really had to do was go out into that crazy melee and keep my eyes open. people ARE kind if you look for it.
i saw a little girl, crying, seperated from her mom and scared, a sight that, these days, sadly, gives people pause for fear of "being a stranger" or of being accused of something far worse. but soon she was surrounded by a smiling group of well-meaning teenagers who gently comforted her and found her mom for her fast.
i saw people, who obviously didn't know each other, chatting, starting conversations as they stood in line, commenting on how great a gift that "20 Q" was, they got one for their nephew...
i saw a woman pass a toy off to someone else who was disappointed that there had only been one left.
'tis the season.
more than ever, take the time to smile. it IS contagious.
my mom used to say that christmas is the time when everyone acts the way they wish they did all year 'round.
that's gonna be my new years resolution. to get there and then keep it going.

so here are the answers to the questions from friday.
again, a lot of them got answered--but a couple not at all.

1. in what town did rob and laura petrie live on "the dick van dyke show"?

new rochelle ny

2. everyone knows that before ER george clooney guest-starred on "the facts of life" and "roseanne". what was the name of the short-lived sitcom he starred in?

scott got it! it was a very unfunny sitcom called ER!

3. who played the 2 darrins and why did the first one leave the show?

dick york and dick sargent. dick york left the show due to severe back problems.

4. who did the voices for tennessee tuxedo and inspector gadget?

get smart's don adams

5. what two recognizable characters are chiseled into the heiroglyphics above the ark of the covenant in "raiders of the lost ark"?

c-3po and r2-d2
wow! only colin got this!
congratulations, colin!
and i thought that this one was very common knowledge...

6. "who is zed?"

zed was played by peter greene, but everyone knows the real answer is "zed's dead, baby. zed's dead."

7. in her 70's hit song "lovin' you", what name does minnie ripperton sing over and over again at the end of the song? (scott--you're out on this one... : )

at the end of the song, she sings "maya, maya, maya, maya" for her daughter, maya rudolph, current cast memeber on saturday night live. now we know where maya gets that amazing voice.

8. on the cartoon "the ant and the aardvark" (the pink panther show) their voices--done beautifully by john byner--were imitations of what two actor/comics?

john did his impression of jackie mason for the aardvark and dean martin for the ant. now ya wanna watch one again, right?

9. what are the three rules that you must follow to own a mogwai?
oh, everybody got this one; 1.) keep out of bright lights--it hurts them. 2. don't get them wet. 3. NEVER feed them after midnight.

10. what were uma thurman's names in "kill bill"?
the three names they used to refer to uma's character were;
1. the bride
2. black mamba
3. beatrice kiddo
(those are the three that matter.
at the wedding she was called arlene
and in the final credits...mommy.)

we'll pick up with a new game in a week or so--so keep comin' back.

in the meantime, can i just take a second to gush over my pal/partner/artist/co-creator and tell you that craig is just knockin' 'em outta the park with these pages for issues 3 and 4?! i mean, i ALWAYS love seeing any artist bring my words to life and make our story happen, but i am just an IDIOT for the pages he's been sending over as things get crazier--and more intense--for our favorite paranormal team!! i print them out and carry them with me! sharon and i went out for sushi the other night and i made her order while i gazed lovingly and appreciatively at pages 2, 3, and 4 from issue 4. they're gorgeous! thanks, craig! these are beautiful! can't wait until everyone sees them!

so okay, i'm outta here.
go do your shopping. call your friends.

smell ya later!

Thursday, December 14, 2006

trivia 2


so i realize that i'm a little other than a few of you--and a LOT older that a lot of you.
i will try to adjust accordingly in the future.

most everything got answered correctly by at least one person, but there are a few that slipped by. possibly these items fall into the category of TOO trivial? when i was participating in trivia championships, we'd call those "minutia". perhaps.

so here's the run-down.

1. the brady's dog was tiger
2. jaws 2
3. twin peaks (as cross-dressing agent dennis/denise)
4. dwindle, dwell, and dwarf
5. simone
6. 0
7. scruffy
8. gordon shumway
9. sean connery, george lazenby, roger moore, timothy dalton, pierce brosnan, and daniel craig
10. brewster, ny

i've always loved the second question 'cause everyone always immediately yells, "JAWS".
and six is a trick question.
question 9: as for the case of david niven and woody allen; every true bond fan knows that none of us ever includes THAT casino royale.

here's some more to frustrate you over the weekend.
these are harder.
remember, no google, no imdb, no cheating at solitaire...

1. in what town did rob and laura petrie live on "the dick van dyke show"?
2. everyone knows that before ER george clooney guest-starred on "the facts of life" and "roseanne". what was the name of the short-lived sitcom he starred in?
3. who played the 2 darrins and why did the first one leave the show?
4. who did the voices for tennessee tuxedo and inspector gadget?
5. what two recognizable characters are chiseled into the heiroglyphics above the ark of the covenant in "raiders of the lost ark"?
6. "who is zed?"
7. in her 70's hit song "lovin' you", what name does minnie ripperton sing over and over again at the end of the song? (scott--you're out on this one... : )

8. on the cartoon "the ant and the aardvark" (the pink panther show) their voices--done beautifully by john byner--were imitations of what two actor/comics?

9. what are the three rules that you must follow to own a mogwai?
10. what were uma thurman's names in "kill bill"?

yeah, some of 'em are older, but let's see how much tvland you've been watching.
have a great weekend!

and thanks to brian who sent me the silly, absurd pic below for our "random picture of the week" spot.
since this is the second one in one week, i'll call this "random picture of the week--extra! #1"

oh, also...not that craig and i are fighting or anything, but which cover copy do you like best...?

Tuesday, December 12, 2006



my head is filled with junk.

total junk.

i have recently been bemoaning to craig and mike (and anyone else who'll listen) my inability of late to put a sotry together the way i used to. oh, sure, i'm fairly happy with the one that's currently running in the perhapanauts, and there are a few other things i'm working on right now that give me that same jolt that writing something you enjoy can bring. but it comes a lot harder than it used to. there was a time when i felt i was on fire and all the elements of a good story would just fall into place in my head. now those elements take a little more rearranging, a little more coaxing into place.

my friend dave will say it's 'cause we're getting older and our memories are going, but i don't buy that. first, because i don't think that storytelling part of my brain has anything to do with my memory. totally different muscles. second, because i KNOW right when this slowing down started, know that there was a pretty powerful emotional...event, i guess, (a break-up) a few years back that left me with a writer's block that shut down almost all production in that area of the plant.
but mostly the reason that i don't feel that it's my memory is 'cause there is just SO MUCH USELESS INFORMATION IN THERE THAT BOGGLES EVEN MY MIND!! I"M BOGGLING MY OWN MIND!!!

here's how my brain works...
i'm watching tv the other day and a commercial comes on for this hair restoration process by bosley.
in an instant, my mind does this.
bosley was the name of charlie's intermediary on "charlie's angels".
bosley was played by david doyle.
they originally wanted tom bosley for the role.
he was busy being howard cunningham on "happy days".
coincidentally, the two played in-laws at odds on the short-lived, 1972 mixed-marriage sitcom, "bridget loves bernie", starring david birney and merdith baxter birney.
an instant!
that's what my mind went to first.
(maybe it's a defense mechanism because i'm in denial over my slowly thinning hair. i dunno.)

either way, that's where my mind goes; to all sorts of bizarre, needless, worthless information that could only help me if i lucked out with those categories on "jeopardy".
the book, america the book, by jon stewart and the daily show gang, asks the question "how many supreme court justices can you name? now how many of the brady bunch can you name? what does that say about you?" 4 supreme court justices (but that's mostly 'cause they had just named them in the previous chapter in the book!) but i can easily conjure up ALL OF THE BRADY BUNCH!! AND THEIR REAL NAMES!!
and what was the dog's name on "the brady bunch"?
what was the dog's name on "the partridge family"?
what was the dog's name on "the ghost and mrs. muir"?
where did anne marie's parents live on "that girl"?
sure, imdb and google and the rest of the internet can put any of that stuff at your fingertips in a hearbeat--but it's rattling around in my head constantly!
and i can't help thinking that if there were a real pensive somewhere that i could off-load some of that garbage maybe i could write something good for once.

so, of course, this leads me to throwing out a trivia challenge.
unfortunately, 'cause i don't have a tv show like" jeopardy" or "who wants to be a millionaire?", we'll hafta do it old school. like a take-home test using the honor system. so NOT using imdb or google or the internet or turning on your tv or referencing your 2006 leonard maltin movie guide, jot down your answers to these and write 'em in to the comments section (or, of course, put 'em in an e-mail and send 'em to me at and we'll see how everybody does.
after this, maybe you guys should send in questions to me and we'll see if my head really is filled with fluff...?
anyway, here's the quiz...

1. what was the dog's name on "the brady bunch"?
2. what movie's poster touted "just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water"?
3. prior to "the x-files", david duchovny played an fbi agent on another tv series. what was the show?
4. there are only 3 words in the english language that begin with the letters "dw". what are they? (proper names and derogatory terms don't count ie; dwight or dweeb)
5. what was the dog's name on "the partridge family"?
6. how many of each animal did moses take on the ark?
7. what was the dog's name on "the ghost and mrs. muir"?
8. what was "alf"s real name?
9. name the 6 james bonds?
10. where did anne marie's parents live on "that girl"?

smell ya later!

Sunday, December 10, 2006

now we're gettin' somewhere...


first off, much thanks to brian for his wonderful perhapanauts script last week, which was not only entertaining, but gave me some time to stock up on items and bits for upcoming blog entries! thanks, bri!

for example--in the spirit of perhapa-fans sharing some of their own artwork and such--here are two more submissions from our pal, don kelly ( ) ; choopie and big!

if you're cutting these out and mounting them on pasteboard to trade with your friends, these are #s 2 and 3 in the series, with don's beautiful sketch of molly being #1! collect all 12!!

thanks, don! they're wicked cool!

after that...okay, i see LOTS of really cool images on the internet everyday. some come in the form of email, some on sites i've searched, others i've found posted on myspace. some are funny, some are touching, some are old toys or comic books that i saw on ebay...i grab 'em, and leave them on my 'desktop', and clutter the whole screen up and then ask myself, "what the hell am i gonna do with these?!" well, i'm gonna share them. they are some cool pictures and i thought some of you might get the same kick out of them that i did.
so i'm gonna start a new segment called "random picture of the week". you might dig it, you might hate it, you might pass it right by. if you wanna comment on it, go to it. if you have any pictures of your own that you may have come across in your travels and think they might fit the bill, send 'em in.

here's the first

random picture of the week #1

that's it for today. wednesday i'm gonna talk some trivia and about all the useless crap i have in my brain.
smell ya later!

Thursday, December 07, 2006

brian's story--"down in the dump" part 3


we received a bunch of mail praising brian's story and more than likely you're skipping all of my babble here and jumping right down to the conclusion. that's okay. go to it. it's GOOOOOD!

it really is. brian, you did a great job and, again, i'm just amazed at how quickly you turned this around! one night!!

hopefully, this'll inspire more of you to write, draw, paint, compose, sculpt, photograph, model, etch-a-sketch, carve out of ham, or lego your own perhapanauts piece and send it in to share with the rest of us. come know you want to!

okay, i'll shut up now. enjoy!
and have a great weekend!



Big and MG conduct a through search of all the dwellings in the cliff, but find no trace of Choopie nor any clues as to what may have happened to the Anasazi who once lived here or any indication that the even did live here. Moving on to the exterior, Big notices massive jagged grooves running up and down the outer sides of the cliff dwellings. Big closely examines the grooves, his expression changing from inquisitive to stoic.

MG: Ready to head back?

Big: Yes, but first there’s something I have to tell you before we get back to Molly.

MG: Okay, what is it.

Big: These cliff dwellings weren’t built under ground; they were forcefully dragged down here.

MG: You mean like by an earthquake?

Big: No, this was done intentionally.

MG: Holy . . . . the kind of power that would take, what on earth are we dealing with here?

Big: Oh, I wouldn’t limit our sphere of inquiry to earth on this one.


MG and Big head back to Molly and Arisa to determine their next course of

MG: This will be a little easier than the last time as there are only two passageways out of this cavern so we’ve got a fifty-fifty chance of picking the right one. So, will it be column A or column . . .

MG stops in mid-sentence because he sees the same little bright blue-eyed creature that Choopie had encountered earlier peaking out from the second passageway. MG immediately breaks into a run while calling over his shoulder to Big and Molly.

MG: You two stay with Arisa, I’m going to try and catch this thing.

No sooner does MG disappear down the passageway then a deathly silence falls over the cavern. After waiting for what seems like an eternity for MG to come back, Big looks over at Molly and says:


Big: I think we better go see if we can find MG.

As Big is speaking the little blue eyed creature peaks out from the other passageway. Big, like MG, breaks into a run as the creature disappears back down the passageway and yells over his shoulder to Molly

Big: If I’m not back in ten minutes, go for help.

Molly, now left alone with Arisa, becomes nervous and starts talking to herself.

Molly: Not good . . . not good . . . Come on Mol, hold it together; your friends are counting on you. You can’t let them down, not after everything they’ve done for you, not after . . .

Just then, Arisa's eyes snap open and she sits bolt upright taking a big gasp of air as if awakening from one of those dreams where you’re falling and about to hit the ground.


Arisa: I saw it Mol, I saw what grabbed Choopie . . . (shuddering and holding herself)

Molly: What is it ‘Ris

Arisa: I don’t know. It’s ancient, almost as old as the earth itself, but it doesn’t have a name because no one who has ever seen it has lived to tell the tale. And I know (hesitating) something even worse,"

Molly: And what's that? (said with fearful trepidation)

Arisa: I know where it is.

Molly: Where? (looking to her left and then her right)

Arisa: Directly below us.

No sooner are the words out of her mouth than the dirt under Arisa explodes into the air and she disappears into the ground.

Molly is momentarily dumbstruck by what she has just witnessed and just floats above in the air unsure of what to do. Finally, a look of resolve spreads across her face as she realizes what she must do. Molly looks down at the ground where her friend just disappeared and dives in after her.



Molly passes through the ground and emerges into a very large cavern the bottom of which is entirely taken up by a gigantic gapping mouth with hundreds of tentacles emanating from its sides waving in the air. (Kind of like the creature in the sand from Return of the Jedi, but on steroids) At the end of each tentacle can be seen a pair of crystal blue eyes that caused everyone up to now to mistake the tentacles for a smaller separate creature. Over to one side, suspended on the wall of the cavern are Choopie, MG, Big, and Arisa, their bodies wrapped up with some type of viscous fluid (looks a little like the stuff in the Alien movies) but their heads and mouths free.


Molly, unnoticed by the creature, floats down to her friends and hovers in front of them.

Molly: How do I get you out of here.

Arisa: I don’t think you can sweetie.

Big: This thing took us with ease and I haven’t been able to even bend this stuff it’s got us trussed up with.

Molly: I can’t just leave you here, I won’t . . .

Team: (in unison) Uh, Molly . . .

Behind Molly can now be seen three of the creature’s tentacles, its crystal blue eyes appearing to be focused menacingly on Molly.

Molly: What . . . (turning her head her eyes widening as she sees the tentacles)

Team: (in unison) Run!

Molly immediately shots up passing through the earth followed closely by the three tentacles that smash up through the earth behind her with relative ease. Molly knows the team is depending on her and is really exerting herself to stay ahead of the tentacles.


Molly emerges from the ground back in the same dump where this all started mere feet ahead of the three pursuing tentacles. Molly’s momentum carries her straight up into the air. So intent is her focus on the tentacles behind her that she doesn’t realize until too late that she is headed straight for the high-tension power wires the span across the dump. To wait to change her course, Molly instinctively shuts her eyes and throws her arms up in front of her to brace for the impact. Fortunately for Molly, she is intangible and simply passes through the cables unharmed. The creature's tentacles, however, are all too real and when the hit those cables the result is a million volts of electricity is sent coursing back down through the creature frying it to a crisp.


Cut to the team back at Headquarters in the break room decompressing from their encounter with the creature under the dump. The Chief enters carrying a white envelope.

Chief: Great job guys, especially you Molly, quick thinking out there.

Molly: (blushing) Thanks Chief

Chief: Now tell me, just how did this whole thing get started.

Arisa: Well Chief, I guess it really started when Choopie’s curiosity got the better of him.

Chief: Stop right there Arisa, that’s all I need to know.

The Chief walks over to Choopie and hands him the white envelope.

Chief: In that case, THIS is for you.

The Chief then smiles, turns and walks out of the room. Choopie opens the envelope while the other’s watch with interest to see what it is. As Choopie reads the letter his jaw drops and then the letter slips from his hand falling to the floor. Arisa, Big, MG and Molly all crane their necks to see what the letter was.

Cut to tight shot of the letter lying on the ground. It is a $300,000.00 dollar bill from the electric company for the million volts used to fry the creature.


Tuesday, December 05, 2006

brian's story--"down in the dump" part 2


i really have nothing to say.
here's part 2.



Half splash of a large cavern with too many passageways leading off in too many different directions. Molly floats and Arisa, MG and Big stand looking around the cavern trying to decide which way to head.

Molly: There are so many passageways, how do we choose?

MG: We could check them all to see if there are any signs of recent passage.

Big: I’m not sure we have that kind of time.

Arisa: Let me see what I can do.

Arisa moves to the center of the cavern and begins to psychically probe for any signs of life.

Arisa: I’m getting something.

Arisa begins to move toward one of the passageways followed by Molly, MG and Big


Arisa arrives at the mouth of the passageway to which she was headed her face tense with concentration.

Arisa: Yes, this is it, I’m definitely getting something from here, I’m . . . . wait . . . what . . . huhhhh, ahhhhhhhh!

Arisa’s eye’s roll up into her head, her body goes rigid and she begins to fall backwards. Molly instinctively reaches out to catch her, but Arisa passes right through her arms. Luckily MG is right behind Molly and is able to grab Arisa before her head smashes into the hard cavern floor.

Molly: ‘Ris . . . (obvious concern and some trepidation in her voice)

MG: Arisa . . . Arisa . . . Arisa . . . (a passion and concern in his voice surprising to all present including himself)

Big: (to MG) Quick give her to me and hold this light so I can see what I’m doing.

Big checks Arisa out as best as he can under the circumstances.

Molly: Big . . .

MG: How is she?

Big: Well, physically, her vital signs are good, but mentally she’s unresponsive. As best as I can determine she’s in some type of catatonic state. It’s as if her mind encountered something that so over whelmed her that she just shut down.


Molly: What do we do now? Should we keep looking for Choopie or should we get ‘Ris back to base.

MG: At this point my gut tells me we’re not just Choopie best chance, we’re his only chance. So I say we keep going.

Big: I agree with MG, plus it will be next to impossible to get Arisa out the way we came in given her current condition.

Molly: Then it’s unanimous. Onward and downward.

Molly floats ahead into the passageway, her role as team scout now almost second nature to her followed by MG holding the blaster and the Big who scoops up Arisa effortless and starts into the passageway.

Cut to shot of Big disappearing down the passageway. The next panel is entirely black signifying the darkness and silence of the cavern now that they have departed. Go to a second black panel, but this time superimposed with sound effects – SKRATCH, SKRATCH, SKRATCH – to indicate that someone or something is behind our heroes lurking in the dark.


MG and Big are walking through the dark passage way. The area immediately around them illuminated by their flashlights, but only a few yard ahead and behind them its pitch black. MG is in front carrying Choopie’s blaster while Big is behind him carrying Arisa.

MG: How you holding up back there? Want me to spell you for a bit and carry her for a while?

Big: No thanks, I’m good.

MG: Ok, but let me know if you change your mind. I’d be glad to do it.

Big: (speaking under his breath to himself) I’m starting to get that impression.

MG: What was that?

Big: (a little embarrassed that MG may have heard him) errr. . . I didn’t say anything.

MG: No, no. I thought I heard something behind us. (holding up his hand for silence) Listen.

At first the passage way is deathly quiet, but just as MG is about to turn and start
walking again they hear it. SKRATCH, SKRATCH, SKRATCH.

MG: There’s definitely something behind us and I don’t think its Molly. Let me get behind you. (MG and Big switch places).

The noise repeats – SKRATCH, SKRATCH, SKRATCH – only louder and closer


Big: Fire a warning shot down the passageway.

MG levels Choopie’s Blaster, aims it high in the passageway and squeezes the trigger, but nothing happens. MG checks that the safety is off, and tries again with similar results. As MG stares down at the blaster in disbelief, again they hear the ominous SKRATCH, SKRATCH, SKRATCH coming down the passage way towards them.

MG: You have got to be kidding me. Choopie, if we find you alive, I swear I’m gonna’ kill you.

Big: What’s that noise.

MG: Oh that, that scratching. That’s nothing, just our impending doom.

Big: No not the scratching, that humming noise.

MG: Humming, what humm . . . (MG and Big simultaneously look down at the blaster and realize that the humming is coming from it.)

MG & Big: (looking at each other) IT’S OVERLOADING . . . . RUN!

MG drops the blaster in the middle of the passage way and he and Big, with
Arisa cradled close to his body for maximum protection, take off down the passageway at a dead run head long into the pitch black. Behind them the humming reaches an ear splitting level and then the blaster explodes collapsing that area of the passageway while sending rock and smoke billowing down the passageway in both directions.


Cut to tight shot of Molly, her eyes wide with wonder and awe. Next panel, still a tight shot of Molly but now her expression changes to one of shock and horror as she hears the echo of the blaster exploding off panel. Molly then turns to the opening of the passage way behind her, the same passage way she knows Arisa, Big and MG are in, and watches with tears forming in her eyes as smoke comes billowing out the passage way exit.

Molly: Guys . . . (with a visible quiver in her voice)

Mere Moments later bursting forth out of the smoke still at a dead run comes first Big, Arisa still cradled in his arms, and then MG right behind him.

Molly: Guys! (now a joyous shout)

Big gently places Arisa on the ground then collapses in a heap gasping for breath with MG collapsing right along side him. Molly then floats down on top of the group hugging them all as best she can.

Molly: I’m so happy to see you guys.

MG: Not as happy (gasp) as we are to see you, Mol, not as happy as we are to see you.

Molly: And you won’t believe what I’ve found.

Big: What did you, (gasp) find?

Molly: Oh not much, just this. (tight shot of Molly gesturing to something behind her which the reader cannot yet see through the dissipating smoke)


Splash Page

The smoke has cleared and there is a wide shot with the team still on the ground in the foreground with Molly’s arm pointing to he background which is filled by an entire intact Anasazi cliff village built into the far wall of the cavern.

MG: It’s amazing.

Big: But, what is it doing here.


Big, still carrying Arisa, with MG walking behind and Molly floating ahead approaches the village. Once there he places Arisa down in one of the dwellings and then steps outside again to get a better look at the cliff dwellings.

Big: (to MG) I think we need to take a closer look at this place. Choopie might be here or there may be a clue to his whereabouts.

(to Molly) Molly, will you stay and keep an eye on Arisa.

Molly: Sure . . . Say guys . . .

MG and Big: Yeah . . .

Molly: Do you think THIS is what really happened to the Anasazi Indians? That something forced them to relocate underground?

Big: I’ve heard stranger theories, mass alien abduction being my favorite, but I’ll see what I can find out. (to MG) Shall we ?

MG: (glancing over to check on Arisa) The sooner we start . . .

Sunday, December 03, 2006

brian's story--"down in the dump" part 1


here, as promised, is part one of the full script written by our own brian mulcahy a month or so ago. it was inspired by a blog in which i posted a strange story about a weird creature a woman in oregon viewed in a backwoods dump. after saying that i wasn't certain how i could weave this crytpo-phenomenon into an upcoming perhapanauts story, brian ran with it and turned this script in OVERNIGHT (still can't believe that!)!
i'll be posting the rest of the story on wednesday and friday.

Perhapanauts #TBA

Twenty-Two Page Story



The setting is a large run of the mill town dump. Arisa, MG, Big, Molly and Choopie are there to discard everything that got broken in the climatic fight scene from their latest adventure. Choopie is in the foreground. In one hand he holds one of his Red Cross juice boxes with protruding straw while with the other hand he is dragging a broken chair. Choopie looks less than thrilled. In the background Arisa, MG and Big are unloading various pieces of debris from the back of a Bedlam SUV. Behind them can be seen high-tension power wires spanning over the dump.

Title: Todd and Craig’s The Perhapanauts in “Down In the Dump”

Credits: brian –– words TBA –– pictures TBA –– colors

Choopie: Oh sure, they make it look soooo glamorous in the movies. James Bond saves the world and he ends up on a tropical beach with the beautiful leading lady. Me, I end up with a broken chair and an all expenses paid trip to the town dump to dispose of the half ton of ruble which is all that’s left of the latest sure fire can’t miss crackpot scheme for world domination. Man, I need a vacation . . . and some pie.


Choopie is taking a sip out of his Red Cross juice box while looking around for a good place to dump his broken chair when he catches something out of the corner of his eye.

Choopie: Huh?

As Choopie looks around he spots several small holes in the ground and then a small area of dirt starting to push upward. As Choopie stares, the dirt begins to fall away revealing a tan object about 12 inches in diameter shaped like the tip of a finger and perfectly smooth.

Choopie: What on earth . . .

As Choopie continues to watch, the creature begins to sway to the left, then to the right, as if looking for something, and then it stops. Suddenly, two beautiful crystal blue eyes surrounded by brilliant white snap open. Choopie’s expression changes from perplexed to delighted. He puts down the broken chair and starts to approach the creature.

Choopie: Don’t worry little fella, I’m not gonna hurt you.

Choopie walks out of the panel so that all we see is the broken chair lying on the ground. Then from off panel we hear

Choopie: Hey, hey . . . . Ahhhhhhhh . . . .

Choopie’s Red Cross juice box flies in from off panel and lands beside the broken chair.


Arisa, Big, MG and Molly are finishing taking the last pieces of debris off of the Bedlam SUV.

Arisa: I think that’s the last of it team, good job.

Molly: I’m afraid I wasn’t much help what with my condition and all.

MG: Don’t worry about it Molly. Plus you were a bigger help than Choopie.

Big: Speaking of whom, has anyone seen . . . .

Choopie’s scream is heard coming from off panel. Arisa, visibly chilled by the tone of the scream is the first to react.

Arisa: Blue Team, I want a four-grid point to perimeter hard target search of this dump for Choopie and I want it fast. Keep your com lines open and stay frosty, no telling who or what we’re dealing with here.

Big and MG take off simultaneously in separate directions. Molly delays, a look of trepidation on her face. She looks over at Arisa who, sensing Molly’s need for reassurance, gives her a slight smile and nod.

Arisa: Don’t worry Mol, I’m sure Choopie just ran into a rat and got startled.

A slight smile spreads across Molly’s face.

Molly: Yeah, I’m sure that’s it ‘Ris.

Somewhat reassured, Molly floats off in search of Choopie.

Arisa waits for Molly to leave, then reaches into the Bedlam SUV and pulls out Choopie’s blaster.

Arisa: Of course, if that were the case, it would have been the rat we heard screaming.


Separate panels of MG, Big and Arisa searching the dump. Cut to a panel of Molly floating with her eyes and mouth wide open excitedly yelling.

Molly: Quick, over here, over here! I’ve found something.

MG, Big and Arisa converge on the area over which Molly is floating. As they arrive, Molly lowers herself to the ground. The four now are standing around looking at the broken chair and the Red Cross juice box, straw still in place, lying on the ground.

MG picks up the juice box.

Big: This thing is still half full. I KNOW he didn’t give this up voluntarily.

MG then gives the box a squeeze causing a stream of blood to shoot out of the box. Arisa, MG, Molly and Big all turn their heads watching the arc of blood as it flies through the air and then falls onto a slight depression in the ground about six feet away from them and almost instantly drains into the earth.

Big: Hello? What do we have here?

Big picks up the broken chair and places it on top of the depression. The ground underneath the chair quickly gives way causing the chair to fall through revealing a surprising large hole in the ground.

Big: Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle (quickly turning to MG) don’t even think it.


Cut to shot of Arisa, MG, Molly and Big looking down into the hole from the point of view of the hole.

Molly: Boy, it’s awfully dark down there. How deep do you think it is?

MG: I’m not sure, but I definitely think we’re going to need a bigger boat.

Arisa: Very funny. Ok, what we are going to need is lights and lots of them.

Big: I’m on it.

Big heads back to the SUV to grab their flashlights.

MG: (speaking in a joking manner) Why Miss. Arisa, I didn’t know you were afraid of the dark.

Arisa: I’m not, wise guy, like any sane person, I’m afraid of what’s in the dark.

Cut to shot of the team, Arisa, MG and Big all holding flashlight, standing around the hole getting ready to start their descent.

Arisa: Molly, you can travel the quickest so you’re on point. Scout ahead and let us know of any trouble spots.

Molly: (a touch of anxiety showing on her face) Will do ‘Ris.

Molly heads down first. Arisa then turns to MG handing him Choopie’s

Arisa: You go next MG and take this. It’s our only weapon and you’re by far our best shot.

MG pauses, looking at her as if he wants to say something, something personal,
but the moment passes. He then nods to Arisa and slips into the hole.


Arisa: (whispering so MG’s back so cannot hear her) be safe (then turning to Big) I’ll go next and you take the rear. Do you think you can make it?

Big: No worse than flying coach. But if it gets any narrower on the way down, I might have to back out, literally.

Arisa: Ok then, let’s do this. (said with a little more courage then she’s actually feeling)

Arisa enters the hole followed by Big who passes with only inches to spare.

Cut to shot of MG, Arisa and Big crawling through a pitch-black tunnel.

Arisa: (to MG) Can you see anything?

MG: Other than the hand in front of my face?

Arisa: Yes.

MG: Then, no.

Arisa: (turning her head back to Big) How you doing back there Big?

Big: Kind of wishing I’d watched something other than the Original Alien movie last night, but other than that . . .

Arisa: (to MG) Any sign of Molly?

MG: Nothing Ye . . . (Molly materializes right in front of MG) . . . ahhh, don’t do that.

Molly: Sorry, but I bring good news, just twenty yards further down this tunnel opens up into a cavern.

Tight shot of MG, Arisa and then Big emerging from the tunnel.

Friday, December 01, 2006

random and procrastinating


it is a writer's job be creative. to test, and hopefully stretch, the boundaries of his or her imagination. to continually look for new twists and turns, new distractions and deviations, new put off actually sitting down and getting to work!

i'll admit it--it's true.
oh, there are days when you're on fire, when you can't wait to sit down and things just take off. times when you sit down to write and only look up at the clock, thinking you've been going at it for maybe an hour to find that 5 hours have passed! times when it's just magic...
but on those days when you need a really big jump-start, well, those are the days when you can be most creative. in finding ways NOT to work. there are lots of tricks we learn, we play on ourselves. rituals and routines we develop to convince ourselves that we're "warming up". other things that NEED doing--this blog is one of them--that we allow to take precedence over the real work, the paying gig.

i've got work to do and really nothing to say here. this is gonna be a random, just-before-the-weekend blog to show you a few pictures that i've been dying to show you (and one or two that i was told not to...)!
hope you dig 'em!

first up, is philippe scherding's latest submission--most of you will recall his underwater molly from a few months back, now posted in our all new fan art section!--choopie is nosferatu!

this, of course, will be posted in the fan art section shortly too!
thanks, philippe! love it! it's really great!

okay, so this i've had on my desktop for a couple of months now and don't know why i'm posting it here. to me it represents everything i loved about comics when i was a kid. it prob'ly won't mean the same to you, but i just wanted to put it up here.

and here's a sleestack.

i don't have any tattoos.
a few months ago i met a girl who had several. one, on her right wrist, said "no regrets". i asked her if she wished she hadn't gotten it. she didn't get it. if i ever got a tattoo, that's what i'd get. "no regrets". and then tell everyone that i'd always had second thoughts about it.
or i'd get this one (--which, just to let you know, i have been forbidden to get.)

next week, i will be running brian mulcahy's dump creature inspired perhapanauts script "down in the dumps" in it's (serialized) entirety, because it's just too big to post in the fan art section...and just too good! : )
if you have a story, poem, sketch, pin-up, comic strip, photo, or haiku about one or all of the perhapanauts, please share it!
we're dying to see it and would love to add it to the fan art gallery!

that's it. i got nothing else. and no regrets.
smell ya later!

Thursday, November 30, 2006

from figaro, with love...


so WAAAAAY back when mike wieringo and i were doing tellos and collecting a good number of fans and friends on our website (we had a rockin' message board!), there were probably about 8 or 9 very frequent posters that soon became known to us as our tellos family. kojee, sus, xavier, maukingbird, figaro...they were a wonderfully positive, vocal bunch who, not only dug the comic, they dug each other and really supported one another in thier messages back and forth. with most of them, their names were all we knew of them, and what we knew of them from their letters to us and their messages to each other, and, over the years mike and i have only had a chance to meet a few of them "in real life" at conventions and such.

of course, regular readers of this blog will recognize kojee's name--he's stuck with me on the journey here to the perhapanauts (thanks, kojee!) and has helped out in ways i can't thank him enough for!

also lurking about--but not posting as much--maybe it's that stupid sign up to comment--i hate that figaro. our pal, john norris, is a composer by day, doing a lot of work with his church (and even put together a beautiful opening piece for our much dreamed on tellos movie...), but at night he takes on the guise of avid comics reader and reviewer. his column for comics in the classroom dot net is geared to guide teachers and parents toward comics that would be appropriate for their kids and hopefully fun for the whole family. he has been kind enough cover the perhapanauts in his travels and below is a link (or at least the web address) so that you can check it out yourselves!
thanks for the great coverage, fig--and for your never-ending enthusiasm!

also, news on the perhapanauts front is that issue 4 of second chances will be bumped a week due to shuffling going on at the printers for the holidays. so rather than a just-before-christmas gift, consider it a pre-new years treat!

well, i gotta go and write some funny books!
smell ya later!

Monday, November 27, 2006

oh, so ya have some questions about the perhapanauts:second chances #2...?


apparently issue 2 of our current endeavor has prompted a whole mess a' questions and, while i absolutely LOVE getting your emails, myspace messages, and, in a few cases, phone calls, i, sadly, must also plead the fifith as far as the answers go. you don't REALLY want me to tell you who those two guys in the suv are...? or what it is that choopie told choopie? or why the cricket squad features a second-in-command who bears a strinking resemblance to a certain member of our perhapa-blog family here...? (well, actually, that one's easy--we really wanted to thank brian for all he's done in promoting the perhapanauts. and, also, we want to kill him in an upcoming issue.)

so, yes, there is lots going on. a lot more than in the first series. and yes, there are a lot of questions to be asked, but, patient. it will all make sense soon enough. (if you really MUST know, okay...'e' me and i'll letcha know what i can...i'm such a pushover...)

as far as news goes, craig just got done updating the perhapanauts website (if you didn't get here by going through that, check it out. it looks wonderful!)
the big news really though is that he's added a fan art/fan fic section where you are now welcomed and encouraged to share your perhapanaut-related drawings, comics, and/or stories with alla your perhapa-pals!! don't be shy--the more the merrier! we're dying to see your versions of our little gang and can't wait to read your short (or long) stories and see what kinda wackiness YOU can get them into! feel free! have fun!
we've already posted some pin-ups by don kelly, mek, and philippe and a great six-page 'haps comics story by my friend, jj muste!
send any submissions YOU might have to
and he'll get 'em up there as soon as possible!

also, i think my interview with MIKE WIERINGO in his volume of MODERN MASTERS is out this week! (at least, i THINK it is...i got a whole box of 'em yesterday...) so go get one and enjoy retrospect on the career and artwork of one of the best artists in comics today! (and yes, i can't wait 'til they let me do one on craig! woo hoo!)

i hope everybody had a great thanksgiving and that you made the most of relaxing over the long weekend. i did.

smell ya later!

Thursday, November 23, 2006

kojee's letter


hope everybody had a great and grateful thanksgiving!
i also hope that you're making the most of the long weekend and spending some time resting and relaxing with family and friends.

for todays blog i wanted to give some credit where credit is due and give an extra special shout out to our pal, kojee.
here's why.

most of you have prob'ly tipped to the fact that i write alla the letters on the perhapanotes pages of the perhapanauts. those letters usually refer to an issue that never was. or never will be. (or WILL they...? : ) anyway, i try to use those letters to tell--or maybe a better term would be 'elude to'--stories that either wouldn't work well as a comic book story or reveal a little something extra about one or another of our players. i have a lotta fun doing them and wonder if anyone reads them.

back in january, inspired by the idea, brian mulcahy wrote to craig and i explaining how much he loved our 100th issue. the letter was a kick--you can see it in second chances 2--and craig and i got several good laughs out of it! i thought, we HAVE to share this, and then asked a few of our other regular perhapablog-pals if they would like to take a swing at it, building on the fun that brian had laid down. i asked jason copland, scott weinstein (who signed as b.clinton : ) and kojee/jared, our tellos friend from long ago. they all laid down some sweet sweet letter parodies and i loved them all. sent 'em in...

...only to find that, because of space, dark horse needed to cut one of the letters.
it was kojee's.
i felt terrible.
and so, here, for your edification and amusement, please enjoy kojee's letter on our glorious 100th issue!

Dear Perhapa-dudes,

Congrats on reaching 100 issues! I've been with the book since day one, and the story just keeps getting better and better! I was heartbroken over Choopie, but he died to save his friends, and the way he died only added to his character.

Sadly, I read online that Craig will be giving up pencilling duties after issue 110. I know he's busy with the Harry Johnson movie adaptation(loved Craig's cameo in the film!), but I'm still gonna miss his style. Is it true that Joe Mad is interested in taking over as artist?

As a big fan of the first Perhapanauts movie, I have to say, please, do not let Universal allow Angelina Jolie to walk out before film number two. Pay her whatever she wants. She fit Molly perfectly, despite what Todd wrote on his blog. Man, Todd starts dating Jessica Alba, and suddenly he's a film critic? Whatever....

Rock on!


thanks, kojee--for the awesome letter and for being so understanding!
have a great weekend!
smell ya later!

i will point out that, while it's nice that everyone sees me attached to some very talented actresses in the future--and that scott remembered jennifer connelly...and her picture on my fridge...i am currently dating a very nice girl named sharon and am very happy where i am.
so jennifer, please stop calling.