the incredible, colossal HEMBECK and a ghost story from mcgill

okay...

as i have posted here several times, one of the funniest people i know--and am proud to call 'friend'--is none other than comics legend, fred hembeck! for those of you not familiar with fred's work, you'd better hustle over to his wonderfully wacky site at

www.hembeck.com

and get hip to this timely tip!

many of you might know fred from his turns at destroying the dc universe and roasting the fantastic four! you might know him from his always informative, always unpredictable weekly strip in the comics buyers guide! me, aside from playing countless hours of rapid-fire volleyball with the guy, i remember fred...

...from his hilarious strips back in the 80's when he published book after book of some-might-say-surreal interviews with the heroes and villains of the day!

read that again: i said, INTERVIEWS WITH THE HEROES AND VILLAINS OF THE DAY!

see, fred, making real the dreams of EVERY comics fanboy, actually drew himself into the strips as the official and accepted interviewer of the marvel and dc universes! he would chat with superman and batman, spidey and the fantastic four, and--one of my favorites--a tell-all interview with scott summers and jean grey pre-death of the phoenix saga! fred asked the hard-hitting questions with hilarious results! what happens when you introduce the human torch to the martian manhunter? green arrow and hawkeye? namor and aquaman?

books published by the now defunct fantaco included:

dateline: hembeck
%$*&#! hembeck
the hembeck files
and more...

so what am i bringing all this up for?
well, i'm glad you asked!

our pals at image comics (man, i'm hawkin' a lotta image comics these days...) have unearthed these buried gems and stuck 'em all together with glue to create



this mighty tome will be weighing in at 900+ pages and will include
EVERYTHING!
ALL OF IT!
LOOK NO FURTHER FOR YOUR FUN AND LAFFS FOR 2008!
IT'S HERE!
foreword by stan lee!
going on sale in february so look for it in upcoming previews!

and now that you know that...

below is a haunting true tale--and illustration!--from our pal, john mcgill!
john was kind enough to send this over to me to add to our halloween fun and i'm thrilled that he was kind enough to share it with us.
so without further ado...


A childhood memory...

When I was nine, my mother had to work nights at Dunkin' Donuts (a
local donut/coffee shop), so she would leave me in the care of my older
sister. This proved to be problematic due to her being in her teens; she
would leave me alone in the house until right before my mom got home. I
didn't squeel due to her being older, and bigger than me (her threats
were legendary).

One night, the cycle began; Mom left for work, and older sis waited a
few minutes then took off herself--forbidding me to not set the house
aflame. I was in my own world, tv and g.i. joes kept me company.

Then I heard it...

We had huge, oak, double doors to our home- to hear the pounding I
heard would have to come from someone, or something big. It shook me out of my
daze into tv land (different strokes did that to me-funny). We had a
sunk-in living room that led to the kitchen, and from there you could go
into the front room where the front door is. Our front room had these
huge windows that ran from the front door to the back through the
dining room (prob be better if I drew a pic). I made it up the stairs to
peek over by the door.
What I saw froze me in my tracks.
A very strange-looking man was peering into my house in my direction.
He had a long mustache and he was either smiling really big, or missing
parts of his face. His right hand touched the window with a thud.
Still frozen, I watched him look all around my house; I didn't know what to
do. He saw me as he squinted his shiny eyes at me. As I stared at him,
I saw my bike in the yard. I say this due to it being behind him in
the yard. He had no legs! I can see his head, chest, and arms; under his
tattered shirt lied nothing but my yard! I could have sworn to see rope
around his neck as well.
We stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity. Finally
something told me to call the cops. The phone was right there on the wall in
arms reach of the kitchen. I grabbed it and turned to dial the police.
As I looked up to see the scary man, he had disappeared.
It turned into a big mess from there, and big sis got caught and in
serious trouble...she didn't like me too much after that.

Hope you liked it...It still scares me today to think of what that guy
looked like.
I think about it now, and who knows what I saw. Seems like yesterday
when I do ponder about it (and I do not like to think about that too
much!)

John McGill


illustration by john mcgill

thanks, john! that's worth a nightmare or two!

we'll have another scary reader entry on monday
as well as the answers to your

"five for friday"

1. name all five "apes" movies in order.

2. what was the name of the orangutan in "every which way but loose"?

3. what was the name of the ape in dc's "angel and the ape"?

4. what legendary comics artist created "monkeyman and o'brien"?

5. what was the name of the 1980's matthew brodrick film that garnered so much trouble from the humane society over the treatment of the monkeys?

* extra credit~~ name the monkees!


s'all for now!
smell ya later!
todd